What makes a really good sex?

The concept of good sex is a topic that is widely exploited by both media and people in their everyday conversations. There are entire sections in the libraries where you can find books about “How to achieve intense orgasm”, “How to realize your sexual potential” and other similar titles.

Most of us, influenced by romantic movies, TV shows and romance novels, are driven by the idea that the automatic arousal in response to the opposite sex and the famous butterflies in the belly are necessary prerequisite for good sex. But, what are actually these butterflies?

The butterflies are nothing else but a more beautiful name for a completely natural nervousness ahead of sexual intercourse. The first time you make love with someone, it is quite logical to enter this new experience with a certain sense of fear and unease. Just as our complete personality is a target of evaluation by the potential partner on our first date, when it comes to sexual relationship our body is the object of evaluation of the new partner before the first sexual intercourse. Therefore, it is very natural that on the eve of sexual intercourse we feel uncomfortable to some extent. However, only moderate discomfort is not the same as expressed feelings of fear and anxiety related to our own sexual competence.

Although most people love to talk and brag about their innovative sexual techniques and the way they can be applied, there is only a small number of people who will share their experience (which is actually natural) in which they felt unpleasant and uncomfortable during the first sexual intercourse with their new partner.

At the present time, which is characterized by a clear race for the confirmation of our own abilities, sex has become one of the instruments that are used as a tool to prove something. That’s why it is not surprising that a large number of people engage in sex as in one of the many activities that prove their worth. The prices we pay for this way of looking at sexuality are fears related to our sexual competence. Having sex with an idea that we must show off, usually leads to inability to maintain a hard erection in men and inability to reach orgasm in women. In this way, instead of practicing sex a way to relax, enjoy and achieve closeness, sex becomes a cause for concern in an increasing number of people around the world. Anxiety and fear are the main obstacles to achieving good sex and it is therefore very important to look at the factors that contribute to their occurrence.

One of the factors that lead to difficulties in sexual arousal in men is the so-called spectatoring – observing in which a man is focused on noticing erectile problems instead of enjoying the experience.   A common consequence of this tendency is weakening of the sexual arousal. A similar thing is present in every woman who has difficulties to reach orgasm. The more they tell themselves that they need to reach an orgasm the less chances they have to achieve orgasm because they are not focused on the erotic sensations which lead to orgasm.

If you are able to overcome these problems and relax, a good sex is guaranteed. 

How to really enjoy sex?

Many people are wondering why sex can’t be less complicated. The truth is that sex can be less complicated if our mind doesn’t interfere with our body and wants to control our body. Most of the people (especially in modern times) are used to believe in their thoughts and judgments and completely ignore the messages that come from their bodies. All the major institutions used for socialization like schools, companies, religious institutions and even families are preaching how we should control our drives because that’s the only way to stay out of trouble, to be respected and valued.

As we grow older, the mind starts to perform another type of control. We are starting to figure out that we should not do things that might offend or disturb anyone else. We start to behave in a way that we always try to get other people’s approval. By the time someone gets ready for his or her first sexual experience the things might get very complicated in the area of sexual relationships. You have managed to master few strategies in order to control your thoughts and manipulate the opinions and feelings of the other people. This is certainly a situation that doesn’t promise having good sex.

Being worried is one of the reasons of having bad sex. People tend to worry about everything. But the truth is that most of those worries are useless and they prevent us to reach our intimacy. Don’t let these worries control your life and block the ability to share intimate experiences with your partner.

A good sex is not just regular sex. In many cases couples consider sex as some kind of routine that must be finished a couple of times a week. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with that but this is not a definition of good sex. Bringing intense emotions in the sexual relationship from time to time can mean a lot because it will deepen the relationship in general.

Good sex is a pleasant and fun experience for both partners. In those cases partners just feel the bond between them. Good sex usually doesn’t happen automatically and it’s rather a process of learning. Good sex requires few things like knowledge, skills, patience, time and practice.

A lot of people pay attention to certain techniques but good sex is linked with presence. A man or a woman that knows all the sexual techniques won’t satisfy your needs if it isn’t honest and open about his or her feelings. The techniques can be considered to be forms of intimate communication.

When we talk about sex, we usually like to compare our sex life with the sex lives of the people we know. We often get the feeling that everyone else have better sex life than we do and that they have sex more frequently. Remember that frequency doesn’t mean good sex. Would you rather have unexciting sex each night or great sex once or twice a week?

Sex is one of the greatest gifts of live, believe in yourself, believe in your partner and always talk and practice new things in your sex life. 

Health Problems in Uncircumcised Men

Although being uncircumcised can bring many advantages there are few problems that can cause some problems in uncircumcised men.

Uncircumcised men or improperly circumcised men actually suffer from two known problems linked with the foreskin of the penis. The first one is phimosis. This is a really unpleasant situation when the foreskin can’t be placed back on the glans penis. This is happening because the foreskin has tightened (in some cases it is swollen) the area just under the glans penis and cannot be placed back. This situation can be very dangerous because not only the glans penis remains unprotected but it also affects the blood flow because the foreskin is usually tightened and disrupts the blood flow. 

Phimosis usually occurs in younger boys and in most cases it is treated with minor surgical procedure. This procedure should be performed while the boy is still young because it is less unpleasant at that age. Long-term phimosis can cause painful masturbation and sexual intercourse as well as limited erection. Phimosis can be caused by many things but most often it’s caused by poor hygiene or previous damages of the foreskin.

The second problem that can appear in uncircumcised men is paraphimosis. Paraphimosis is a term used to describe a situation where the foreskin cannot remain on the glans penis for a longer period. This problem often happens in men who have improperly circumcised penis, frequent use of a catheter in the urethra or practicing some unconventional sexual techniques.

There are symptoms that can indicate that you or your child is having a problem with phimosis and these symptoms include: trouble with urination, blood in the urine, pain in the penis and pain during urination. The same symptoms can be noticed in paraphimosis but the pain is even greater and more intensive. You can also notice change of colors on the back of the glans penis. The reason behind this change of color is the weak blood flow in that area.

As we’ve said these two medical conditions can be solved with a surgery but there are few other things that you can do. Phimosis usually doesn’t require professional medical help but if it isn’t treated in the right way it can lead to paraphimosis. If you can’t find a way to get back your foreskin on the glans pens request medical help. Doctors usually have instruments that can expand the foreskin and get it back where it should be. Cold compress can be very helpful when it comes to paraphimosis because it will make th skin more resistant so the patient can forcefully place the foreskin on the glans penis. If all these things are not helpful the patient has to be prepared for a surgical intervention performed with local anesthesia.

There is no exact advice about how uncircumcised men should protect themselves from these conditions. However, keeping the intimate hygiene on a high level by using lukewarm water and pH neutral soap is definitely helpful.