Sexual Performance Anxiety

Men always have some pressure of sexual performance, the mindset and thinking that is in the society makes them believe that they should have thoughts like this. Examples are as follow:


-can always get an erection.
-should initiate sex.
-always want sex.
-should be in control.
-give women mind-blowing orgasms.
-should have a big penis, and if they don’t, they are inadequate.
-should know what to do in the bedroom.
-should succeed.
-should hide any feelings of inadequacy or vulnerability

All these believes makes men so worried and always thinking different ways to improve sex life and sometimes they worry too much that it affect their sexual performance. They need to know that sex itself is an activity that involve 2 parties and it depends on both parties to have a good sex life. If you are worry about things like this on the bed, how are you going to enjoy sex? Like what we have discuss before, sex depend on 2 person, it require communication, different people have different preference, you can't bring all your previous experience to expect it works perfectly in current relationships. Communicate and learn is a process.


-Ask your partner to caress you, and say how you would like to be touched.
-Consciously breathe during sex.
-Say yes when you want to.
-Say no when you want to.
-Have sex only when you want it.
-Self-pleasure (masturbate) slowly.
-Fantasize when you self-pleasure.
-Touch yourself all over, and notice where it feels good.
-Talk about sex with your partner.
-Have a sexual experience with your partner without having intercourse.
-Touch your partner’s body for your own pleasure.
-Take care of your body.

There are some creative ways for you to improve sex life with your partners here. Yes, masturbate is good sometimes as it helps you to learn more about yourself, it's a way to learn about yourself. There is no shy to masturbate. Know about your body, know where is your sensitive area, you can let your partner know about it and they will know how to pleasure and satisfy you. Foreplay is a very good way to learn about your partner's body, and we have mention many time that girls do enjoy a lot during foreplay. Most of them enjoy it more than sex itself. Learn about their body and you can make them orgasm in no time and sure they will give you a very good response.

Why do people have sex?

Came across an article research why people have sex, omg, I though it's in our blood? And people still setup  research to find it out. Sex is a need of all kind of animals, right? The report seems to make sex more reasonable by saying that our brain and body are design to motivate us to have sex more. Even that we are not design the way it is, we are born for it. I think that's why we have 2 kind of sexes since we exist, male and female.

And sex can do so much of good to you, well let me come out with some reason to make sex better. Sex burns calories, I bet this is one of the most interesting way to burn calories, do you know that even kissing can burn calories as well? What else? Having sex makes your mood better, you will have a more pleasant day when you have satisfying sex, right? Sex does reduce stress, and this kind of entertainment is much better than other, it's free, ok if you have a partner. You prefer to have sex or movie or even a football match?

"Dummies.com said that many people engage in sex for the sensory experience, the wide range of physical and emotional pleasures that a person can derive from sexual activity. Part of the glue that holds longtime love together is sex" Ha, now only I know that dummies site also talk about sex. The sensory experience, the need of being hug and feel of being care and love. I guess that's the emotional pleasures means here. Sex is also one of the main factor that helps to make the relationship stronger, sex is something that can't be miss from a romantic relationship.

Having babies, is it a good thing or bad thing? It really depends on you, but luckily most of us still love to have our own children, I guess babies is one of the good thing about sex. Sex can improve social status and a kind of revenge as well? The social status it means here is to become popular, the only thing that I can think of it is using sex as a tool to become a star. And revenge? That is a very bad way to revenge, sex as a revenge?

Sex Advice

I had share with you that a sex text is always a good foreplay even when they are not in front of you. This can help them to be in the mood for sex before you even start foreplay. It's a good way to stimulate your partner if you are in a rush, a quickie. You will hope that your partner is enjoying sex even it's a quickie, everyone is hoping they can have a better sex life, and only some text message can help you to make the sex better, isn't it amazing?

Text flirting is one of the foreplay, so if you can make a good foreplay, you will have better sex. Don't think that this texting thing won't help you. Go for it.

There are some samples here that can help you, it's from Red Book Mag. I'm sure you can search online for more flirty text message to turn your partner on when he or she is still working. The text messages here are some examples, and it's from her to him, guys you have to come up with your own.

-"I'm trying on bras but I need a second opinion."
-"Waiting for you at home: beer, chips, and best of all, me!"
-"You, last night. #makingmeblushtoday"
-"Tonight's plan: making you appreciate chocolate as much as I do. You'll see."
-"Picked up a surprise for after the kids go to sleep. I think we need to move up their bedtime for tonight."
-"I found my cheerleading outfit. It still fits."
-"My thoughts are unusually R-rated today. I can't imagine why…"
-"So, I'm really learning a lot at that pole dancing class…"
-"This text message is a gift certificate for one move of your choice tonight. Present it at the door."
-"No kids. No panties. No rules."

The best thing about these sex messages, it takes you not more than 5 second to read it. Can we say that you may turn him on in 5 seconds? Remotely! Girls don't worry that your body is not in shape, your breast is not the same size, guys won't be able to notice that when they are having sex with you. Of course you can always improve yourself to have better sex, but don't give yourself too much pressure during sex. You may do all these in your daily life. Not in shape? Do some exercise, have a jog, find something that you enjoy so you won't feel the pain while working out. My friend will turn on the music and dancing while she is cleaning the floor.

Have a sneaky sex

Some of you guys may still staying with your family and some of you may be a student, if you are going home with your love one and it may not be convenient to have sex. We just want to share some of the idea here that you may use it to sneak in sex in between, oh, am I being a devil here? If your parents are open that your boyfriend or girlfriend to stay overnight, then late night sex is the best for you, but keep it quiet. You know it's very quiet at late night, you don't want to wake your parents up in the middle of the night. Lock the door as well, you don't want them to see you both naked on the bed. It will be a very exciting sex as you guys will worry that someone is going to knock on the door anytime, it will be a hot and spicy sex. When both of you have to keep it quiet, you can't moan in the middle of love making, it will make other senses of yours stronger.

Do you have a bathroom in your bedroom? Yes? Oh my, you are lucky, you can have yourself a shower sex, you can feel how sexy it can be by just listen to it right? And sex in the bathroom are more saucy and super hot, the feeling can be very different from your own bedroom. If your shower can be detach from the wall, point the shower at her clitoris and you can go in from behind. You can imagine how satisfy she can be, but remember to ask her the water temperature that she is comfortable with.

Your parents may have some groceries that may need your help, this is a very good chance for you to sneak out without any excuse. After that it's a very good chance for you to have car sex, another scene that you can watch in the porn very often and it's always something that you should try before you die. If you have a big van then it can be a mobile room for you, go to some where that is remote and the sky is all yours.

Some of the ideas here may need more time, if your time is short then make the sex short, save the foreplay. Can it be done? Yes, you may seduce him or her the whole day, tease them, and let them having the mood for sex long before you get into the bedroom. Some very creative way to do that, you may even text them some very secy message even they are just in front of you. By the time you are in the bedroom, she is all prepared for sex.